Re-entry circles with incarcerated men

In 2001, my son was sentenced to 2.5 years in the Kansas Juvenile Correctional Facility. Let’s just say it was God’s way to open my heart to the flock that He was calling me to shepherd. For more than two decades, I’ve been teaching, mentoring, and supporting incarcerated men, women, and juveniles.

My son’s incarceration also prompted me to get my PhD in educational leadership, with a focus on e-learning curriculum and content design. My dissertation, however, focused on the impact of restorative practices on empathy, forgiveness, and moral disengagement, and I administered several assessments to 240 incarcerated juveniles to collect data to test my thesis.

Reentering society for anyone who has been incarcerated is a struggle, even for those with support and resources. This is part of what brought me to Healing Circles Global. I continue to invest in people, systems, and processes that feed my soul.

Over the summer of 2024, I facilitated restorative reentry circles for men in our county treatment center. Many of them had criminal records, and this six-month dependence rehabilitation program was part of their release criteria. After they completed the program, many of them were required to transition to an Oxford House for six to twelve months before they could secure other housing, including returning to their families. (Oxford House Kansas sponsors self-run, self-supported recovery houses located in various neighborhoods throughout the state.)

The format of the circle I hosted was that of Healing Circles Global, and the prompts included topics such as:

• The concepts of “real men” vs “good men”
• Preparing for the long journey back to regaining a seat at the family table, much less the head of that table
• Removing masks and discovering true and desired character
• The importance of making small deposits in the emotional bank account of others
• Granting and requesting forgiveness of self and others

Many of these men discovered the fictional characters they’d been conditioned to emulate, and some recognized how failure to live up to these expectations drove them to unhealthy dependencies.

These men were grateful to realize that the circle offered a completely different opportunity than some of the other, more clinical sessions they attended. During the final two weeks of the circle, I passed out index cards on which they could provide feedback.

Here are some of their comments:

• “It took me time to realize that the same people would not be present for each circle. But I realized, each offered its own unique benefit.”
• “I look forward to entering a space without judgment (rare for men!) and a place where I feel affirmed that I am capable of being restored.”
• “Most other ‘treatment services’ seem to want to focus on fixing me from the outside-in, but the circles allow me to be transformed inside-out. This experience helps me recognize that I do have the capacity within myself to heal.”

Recently, the Lansing Correctional Facility opened a new career campus to give incarcerated people access to education and to provide training for careers that are in high demand. The mentor coordinator there told me that the men had nothing to do in the evening, so since December 2024, I’ve facilitated a class based on Stephen Covey’s book titled The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Week by week, we go through the book and share what we found most impactful.

After each class, I facilitate a restorative healing circle using the HCG format and agreements. I’ve been amazed at the response and the changes in attitude that the consistent attendees have made. Many have shared that they’ve been inspired to reorient their goals and behavior as a result. The circle allowed them to share and process feelings and emotions, and be vulnerable, in trusted space.

It’s been a blessing to be involved in this effort. It has taught me that it sometimes takes decades to see positive results that radically impact people’s lives. Several months ago, my wife suggested that we use a talking piece during difficult conversations with our now 40-year old son and his own 16-year-old son. Our grandson has been in our son’s custody 90 percent of the time for the past 18 months. The two of them now recognize that the healing circles process promotes an environment that encourages vulnerable sharing of emotions and provides deeper understanding that supports interdependence, recognizes the feelings of others, and nurtures relationships. I’m so glad to pass this technique on to two more generations!

 

 

Please note

At Healing Circles, the foundation of our circles is built on the authenticity of those who host them—with each host bringing their unique voice, personal perspective, and lived experience to the space. Healing Circles hosts and guardians are independent circle organizers. Their statements, opinions, and impressions are their own and do not represent the views of Healing Circles Global or Commonweal.